Bengali web series: FAMILY
EPISODE 8: নামে কিবা কাম (What's in a name)
AN OVER CONFIDENT DATING !
Created by Sanjib Nath
A) EXT. PLAY GROUND - EVENING
Hero is sitting in a river side romantic place. It's a play ground but mostly used for romantic couples. He's sitting on the ground holding a packet of nuts in his hand.
In the mean time the girl, who's referred as condom di by Hero, walks towards Hero. She comes and stands in front of Hero.
What a surprise ! Black-beauty is here.
Anything wrong ? You forgot today to call me as...
Stupid Ram told you about this name too !
May I sit here ?
You may sit, you may lie,
I'm all your's.
No, I mean...
You don't like dark complexion, right ?
Yeah, it was so. Black money and white b... I mean, beauty.
Because of the demonetization effect,
I started liking black-beauties along with white money.
Good, good. Good for our country.
By the way, it wasn't necessary to rephrase the bitch by beauty.
That word defines your culture.
HERO (after offering nuts to her)
Hey, aren't you talking shit ?
Why ? Do only boys have the birth right to talk shit ?
Whatever, won't you take me to a hotel ?
Hotel ? What do you mean ?
Do you think I will fall for you for few nuts ?
I was talking about a hotel for dinner.
What did you think ?
What can I think ?
Did you leave anything for me to think ?
GIRL (while sitting near him)
But, that day you were talking too much about fantasization.
That was to impress you.
Do you think I was impressed ?
I'm sure that, you are.
And... I can see that now.
So much of confidence is not good for health.
It can lead to over confidence at anytime !
Control yourself, Guitar-bro.
Otherwise you'll stumble so badly,
that you'll forget even fantasizing !
Take a bet... This is a bet.
I'm confident, I won't stumble.
And... I don't believe in fantasization.
I believe in real thing!
You lose your control in the name of hotel,
and now faking about believing in real thing !
HERO (gets up n pulls up holding her hand)
Let's go... to the hotel.
Look, after going there,
I mean, don't lose control even before reaching the hotel.
Well, you don't lose control after going to the hotel.
Where is the hotel ?
Let me take you to that side, hotel QUEEN.
Wow ! This side, that side...
You must be having lot of experiences.
This is not about experience, sweet heart.
This is called knowledge.
Let me share with you in QUEEN...
Both of them starts walking towards the ferry ghat as if Hero is taking her on a dating. It was more of an overconfident dating. They take a ferry and take ride to the other side of the river.
B) INT. OFFICE CUM RESIDENT – NIGHT
Chanakya is relaxing on his bed kept on the floor of the big office hall under the fan. Hero is practicing guitar sitting on a chair. Ram is sitting of the floor under a switched on light and reading some study material. They are talking to each other. Hero is sharing his encounter with condom di. Ram gets a blank call and keeps his mobile on a chair after a few "hello"s.
I don't understand your style.
Yeah Chaka, I totally forgot to ask the name.
That's ok ! Temporarily use the name 'Condom-sister'.
'Condom-sister' name is for your use,
It's black-beauty for me.
But, thanks to you.
Why ? Why ?
Initially I got angry on you,
because you told her about the name 'Condom-sister'.
Then I realized, because of you only
I got to hear the word from her mouth.
You'll never know the pleasure of hearing the word CONDOM from a girl,
unless you hear yourself.
And the way you keep your head down on books,
I'm sure you'll never get to know about that pleasure.
CHANAKYA (absent minded)
What will Ram never get to know ?
He is studying day and night.
Well said Chaka,
studying day and night.
But this is not that study.
There are subjects which need to be studied.
And there are few other subjects which need to be felt first,
after that, need to be felt further in depth with precaution.
What is this Hero ?
Stop your confusing dialogues.
Why confusing ? Hero is correct only.
First you study with your Madam,
then you feel and by-heart it.
In case of trouble, go to Madam.
Very well said, Chaka.
Let him grab his Madam tomorrow only and...
You don't know Chaka...
I know everything.
You're reading all the time, but I don't see any fruitful result !
And he... couldn't even ask a girl her name,
and throwing big big dialogues !
What's in a name, Chaka?
Especially when everything is happening without the name !
Forget about the name, black-beauty fell for me for few nuts only.
My understanding about her intention was validated by my sixth organ.
I mean, sixth sense.
Immediately I proposed to take her to a hotel.
What are you saying ?
Did you take her to a hotel ?
What was the menu in your dinner ?
Chaka, you're spoiling my mood.
How can you think I'll take her to a hotel for dinner ?
Did you ever hear that, I'm taking a girl to hotel...
that too for dinner ?
I don't understand this generation at all.
We almost used to pee on pants in fear,
if we had to offer a girl peanuts. And you guys...
It's almost same in this generation too.
Except the fact, peanuts are neatly packed these days,
and fear is wrapped by a plastic cover.
And the pee...
Forget about metaphor.
You fought with her in college on the other day.
When did you impress her ?
HERO (hitting on guitar string)
This is called confidence, bro... Confidence!
White babes fall for me, without much effort.
And you're asking about black-beauty !!
On my guitar's string,
and with my fake fighting, she was already impressed.
Is it ?
Isn't it ?
Otherwise why would she come behind me in the bank of river ?
Get out of the river bank, and enter into the hotel please.
Control was totally lost in the hotel !
Whose ? Your ?
HERO (unpleasant smile)
Are you joking, huh?
Who else ? Her only !
Can you imagine ?
Dark hotel room... and a virgin girl.
CHANAKYA (tired and sleepy eyes)
But you don't drink alcohol, right ?
Oh dear Chaka, this is not that Gin.
This is vir-gin.
God knows ! In out time...
Can we move out of Mohenjo-daro civilization ?
And, concentrate on hotel room uncivilization ?
Why so much of interest ?
What do you expect after that?
It's all censored.
I can't tell you in detail what happened after that.
But you should know, my hands' touches were creating arts...
C) INT. HOTEL ROOM – EVENING
Hero holds black beauty's hands and pulls her towards him. She comes closure and looks at his eyes intensely.
Heeero, Is it ?
Did you think that I'm a guitar?
I'll start playing with your touch !
I'm a girl. A living being !
You just can't play with a girl like guitar.
You can play a guitar without rhythm...
But, you can't play with a girl just like that.
You can only play with her rhythmically !
No Hero can play with a girl without rhythm.
Asking one's name is a basic etiquette.
It's good to have confidence, but not over confidence.
You'll surely stumble then.
Bye.... I believe, you can't even fantasize in this mood.
By the way... Ai mood e to fantasize o hobe bole mone hoy na!
Just enjoy your nuts, I mean peanuts...
Hero's hands keep holding her hands without saying any word. He looks very ashamed and clueless.
D) INT. HOTEL RECEPTION – NIGHT
Hero holds reception guy's hands, and begs him to cancel and refund his hotel booking money.
I need to cancel my booking for an urgent matter.
Can you please consider refunding my money ?
You know... I mean... Please Sir...
I've used the room for few minutes only !