Bengali web series: FAMILY
EPISODE 5: নামের ব্যাখ্যা (The naming convention)
MMS AND ANGER MANAGEMENT
Created by Sanjib Nath
Michael and Juktamukhi both are sitting in their drawing room. Michael, little down in health because of his previous night hangover, is busy reading on the screen of his Lenovo laptop latest model on his table and chair. Juktamukhi is on a stool. She looks at Michael for a while in anger and tries to convince him to stop looking at his favourite Lenovo 15 inch laptop screen while she is having an important conversation with him. However she gets more irritatingly angry and disturbed seeing him reluctant about it. Situation is similar to the serious and silent sky, clouds and trees just before the starting of a huge storm.
Tumi chharbe laptop ta?
Tumi balo na ki bolbe.
R katobar jigyes karbo
Je kal rat e kothay chhile?
Bollam to office e,
Matal der awaz o shuniye diyechhilam,
Nijeo matal hoye phirechhilam.
Aar ki chao?
Ami sotyi-ta jante chai.
Amar dike takiye balo
Keno tumi ki lie detective machine
Je takiye bolle red bip debe?
Tomar oi laptop ta chhere
Kotha bolte ki khub problem hochhe!
Ami chokh diye kotha boli na!
Mukh diye boli.
(looking at her)
Gitay haat rekhe
Ki sotyi bolte hobe!
Tumi kaal office theke soja bari esechhile?
Aar kal ratre tomake ke chhere diye gechilo?
Amar mone nei.
Mod-er songe songe moner matha kheyechhile
Seta to bujhlam.
Kintu, tomar gari kothay?
Eta ki kore mone achhe,
Je gari office e?
Sotyi kore balo
Ke tomake chere die geche ?
Tomar oi receptionist?
Tomar ki cholchhe ta ki?
Laptop shows matrix hero-villain slow motion fighting scene. Michael secretly dials Hero’s number on his Micromax latest android mobile and makes his mobile volume down while talking to Juktamukhi. He smiles little exaggeratedly when call gets connected to Hero.
Tumi amar dike takiye kotha balo.
Amar matha phete jachhe…
R O !
Tomar Eto hasi asche kotha theke !
Shono eta, husband bolchhe…
“shashur shashuri bodh hoy sea-saw khelte khelte
payda korechhilo duto ke.
Baro ta aituku chhotto,
R chhoto ta aisa baro”.
Tomar ekhon joke er kotha mone holo!
R ki emon interesting joke eta je?
O ! Ei ei ! darao darao…
Tumi amar baba ma bhai er sathe compare korle,
Tomar eto dur nongra chinta je…
At this point the mobile call gets disconnected and his Micromax latest phone screen light goes on and off. Juktamukhi’s attention goes on the screen and she realizes that Michael was making this conversation listening to someone.
Kake shonachho amader kotha?
Ke eto tomar piriter
Je tumi kato dukhye achho seta
Na janale tomar
Hangover katchhe na?
Michael gets little angry too and connects to Hero again and tells him about his previous night joke comparison. Hero again disconnects the call.
Katle keno baby,
Ager din bolchhile na
“such a meaningless comparison”?
Srimoti Juktamukhi mukh jukto kore
Kemon meaning buje comparison ta dhorlo!
na na, rakhbe keno,
ebar amar shradhyo kibhabe hoy
(call gets disconneted)
Amar baba ma na hoy sea-saw khelte khelte
amader janmo diyechhilo.
Tomar baba ma ki korte korte tomar mato
Suputro-ke payda korechhilo?
Saap ludu khelte khelte?
Tai tumi ekbar edike kato to
R Ekbar oke chobol maro?
R ke tomake eto pirit kore dudh kola khaoyachhe,
Je take na shonale tomar r hochhe na?
MICHAEL (concentrates on his laptop)
Ki achhe ai laptop tar modhye,
Daao to Dekhi ekbar…
She goes near to the table and start pulling the laptop. Immediately Michael closes the laptop screen and places it safely on the book self. Juktamukhi becomes angrier as she couldn’t take her anger out of his Lenovo laptop and tries to snatch his Micromax mobile handset to throw on the floor.
Accidentally she put pressure on the table corner and breaks one leg wheel of the table. Michael somehow saves his newly bought Micromax latest phone. She gets furious after that.
Ki bhebechho ki tumi?
Khub sahosh hyechhe tomar, nah!
Sahosh ! Sahosh Amar ki go,
Sahosh to berechhe tomar.
Raat dupure receptionist ese
Barir dorjay chupi chupi chhere die jachhe.
office e gari pore thakchhe.
Amar sada-mata bhai ta-ke uskachho!
ami naki uskiyechhi !
By the way, Parash sada-mata noy,
Amar bhai jai hok,
Tomar sahos hoy ki kore
oke Juhi ke niye uskanor?
Shala naam-er belay sab ekkebare…
Beka taal gachh ta Parash-Pathor,
R mutki hathi ta Juhi-Chawla…
R sarakhyon mukh ha korei ache,
Se kina juktamukhi.
Ami naki uskate gechhi!
Naam-er bekhya tumi r nai ba dile,
(gets up towards her immediately in anger as if someone untruthfully blamed on an sms service provider)
Khabor-dar na, bole dichhi.
Jole gelo naki?
Ebar giye srodhyeyo soshur moshai ke jigyes kore asbo,
Ki su-matlab niye tomar naam MMS rekhechhilen .
Shono ,onyer dike angul tolar aage
Nijer dike takio …
Amake gyan dite hobe na,
Nijer kutil mon-e jor lagiye
Dekho odike parash pathor ki operation chalachhe.
Oh… tai boli.
Kutil kotha-ta Parash kotha theke sikhlo!
Khabordar bole dichhi,
Amar bhai ke na ekdom ulto palta…
Keno, Tomar bhai ki dudh-khaoya bachha?
Mutki-r ghaare chore prem marate parchhe, r…
Mukh samle kotha balo!
Ki bhasay bou-er songe kotha bolte hoy,
Janbo na, dibbi jaani.
Tobe oi kotha-ta ki jeno ache,
PARASH (enters into the drawing room from outside / VO)
Ai Didi, Tora jhogra korchhis?
Laptop screen shows the final fighting scene where hero enters inside villain’s body and comes out destroying him. Michael and Juktamukhi look towards the door.