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Bengali web series: FAMILY

EPISODE 1: বউ (The wife)

Starting with a romantic song doesn't mean a happy ending!

Created by Sanjib Nath

 

SCREENPLAY

ekjon jubak ek mohila ke baam haat diye tar matha aar daan haat diye soris dhore rekhe jor kore thote kiss korar chesta korchhe. Dujonei bhalo poshak pore achhe. Mohila nijeke chharanor chesta korchhe.  Jubok jor kore kiss korar chestay byesto. Meye ti nijer haat diye kichhu khojar chesta korchhe dressing table er taak e, aar hothat kore ekta lipstick tule ney taak theke. aar takkhuni se lipstick khule nijer thote lagiye ney. tarpor haste suru kore, karon cheleti aar kiss korte pare na nijer thote lipstick er rong lege jabar bhoye. Chhele ti kiss korar chesta bandho kore, aar krittim haar swikar kore bou-er shaari'r achol diye nijer thot mochhe alto kore.

Tarpor swami-shtri dujonei kotha bolte bolte party te jabar prostuti nite thaake. aar chhele ti bhul shabdo diye ekta hindi gaiyte shuru kore.

Chhele ti poshak pore nijer chul set korte thake. Bou shaari pore aynar samne sajte thaake. Bou er mathar chul e volumized shampoo r chhap spasto, aar husband matha uchu kore side katiye aynay nijeke dekhe majhe majhe. Sustho aar sundor bhabe tara ready hote thaake. bou ti nijer sorir aar shaari diye aral kore husband ke aynay dekhte aral korte thaake dustumi kore. dujonei party r prostuti nite thaake aar romantic dustumi te magno thaake.

Somay aar kotha batra r saathe saathe poristhiti poriborton hote thaake.

HUSBAND

tum-e apna banaanaa ka kasom…

WIFE

kiser kasooom? ( banana-r kasooom? )

HUSBAND

byengo kora hochhe, hya?

WIFE

chhi chhi… amar eto spordha!

ki je balo!

HUSBAND

ami r ki balbo?

dekhtei pachhi

WIFE

kothay dekhte pachho?

dekhte pele

oi to darkaker mato chul

achranor jonye

eto lampho jhampo korte na!

HUSBAND

prothome byango,

tar por volumize shampoo-r eto ahonkar!

WIFE

mithye dhosharop!

nijer height er ahonkar ektu chhere

ebar nichu hoye amar sharee-r kuchi-ta dharo to dekhi

kemon paro

HUSBAND

jodi na pari?

WIFE

na parle tomar-i party-te pouchhote late hobe

HUSBAND (while helping her on sharee’s fold)

kon kaj-ta eka korte paro?

nijer dress ta parjyonto eka porte paro na.

kiser je ahonkar tomader!

WIFE

er modhye “tomader” kotha theke elo?

HUSBAND

tai to.

sharee porte gele kuchi dharo,

ranna korte gele nun taste karo,

sajte bosle kemon lagchhe balo,

TV dekte bosle juti-ta-ke ki maniyechhe balo?

FB te upload korte gele konta beshi like pabe balo?

aare, keno balbo?

amaar kon kajtay tomay bolte boli?

odike phonsh korar belay number one.

WIFE

aschorjyo, ek kuchi dhorte bolay

eto kotha!

dhorte hobe na kuchi.

jabo na tomar oi matal-er party te.

Bou tar shaari khule phele, aar bari te porar ekta poshak porte shuru kore.

HUSBAND

aare, aare, ki holo, khulchho keno?

WIFE

tomar khushi hobar dorkar nei,

tomake khushi korar mato karoner jonye khulchhi na!

HUSBAND

hya, se to jani.

amar khushi kobe sojhyo holo tomar?

WIFE

kon khushi-r kotha balchho?

mood hok na hok suru hoye jao…

HUSBAND

dekho, faltu bolbe na.

kobe tomar ichchhar birudhye kichhu korechhi?

WIFE

Oh God!

tomader mathay ki r kichhui dhoke na?

ami mod gela surur kotha bolchhilam.

eta mone rekho, amra jao kori

tomader songe discuss kore kori,

tomader jonye kori.

r tomra?

cigarette er gandhe bhut palay, odike meye dekhlei mukh haa hoye jaay

bomi-te gari bari bhase, athocho free-r mod pelei gola parjyonto bhorti

nijer bou-er height parjyonto jano na, odike receptionist-er sab number mukhosto

google theke copy paste kore kore chakri bachao, odike ranna-r boi dekhlei upodesh suru hoye jaay!

oh hay, receptionist-er number maane ami phone numbers er kotha bolechhilam

tomader to abar numbers maane 36-36-36 chhara r kichhu dhoke na magoje

Chhele ti bhishon rege jaay, mukh theke kotha beroy na. Nijer mone bir-bir korte korte barie beriye jaay…

HUSBAND

hmmm…grnnn…grnn…

tomar songe kotha bolai bekar

manush sadhe sadhe mod khaay?

Chhele ti dorja khub jore bandho kore baire beriye jaay, aar pray songe songei abar dorja khule bhitore dhoke.

HUSBAND

by the way, ota 36-26-36

36-36-36 size shuyor-er hoy,

aar hoy barir bou-er.

Abar dorja bandho kore chhele ti baire beriye jaay.

WIFE

ki bolle, darao bolchhi.

uttor na diye gele, bhalo hobe na bole dichhi…

Husband barite theke bou er chechanor awaj shone aar bairei dariye thaake. bhetore ase na, kintu baire dariye bou er rege jaoya ta upobhog korte thaake, aar khushite nijer daan haat mutho kore hat jhakiye "yes" kore.

WIFE

khabordar, jamar kolar unchu korbe na bole dichchhi.

Ek muhurter jonye husband haasi bandho kore dorjar dike takay, aar dorja thele bhitore uki maare.

WIFE

Ami tomake haare haare chini.

HUSBAND

Tumi kochu cheno!

Ami “yes” korechhilam.

Ebar r o jore dorja bandho kore husband beriye aase aar nijer juto porte shuru kore. sei somay tar shala bairer gate diye ghar e dhoke.

BROTHER-IN-LAW

Kothay cholle, party?

HUSBAND

hmm re.

bhetore ja, Tor didi achhe.

Tor bou kemon achhe?

BROTHER-IN-LAW

ke, Juhi?

kothay r bou banate dichhe Didi!

HUSBAND

aare, ami songe achhi.

Tui bari theke uthiye niye aay,

mondir-e biye kore amay khabor de

sab samle nebo.

BROTHER-IN-LAW

sotyi? thank you jamai-babu.

Didi’r to Juhi-ke ekdom pachhondo noy!

HUSBAND

o sab ami samle nebo,

tui mondire uthiye to niye aay…

BROTHER-IN-LAW

ok boss! tumi na thakle amader je ki hoto!

kaal sokalei operation…

HUSBAND

achha, ekhon bhetore jaa.

tor didi ke abar ai sab kichhu bolis na jeno!

BROTHER-IN-LAW

matha kharap.

Husband shalar dike takiye meki hasi dekhiye beriye jaay gate diye. Shala dhire dhire bedroom e dhukte thaake. Husband beriye jabar somay mone mone protishodher khushi te ole othe...

HUSBAND (VO)

dekh kemon laage…

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